Sunday, August 23, 2009

Happy 7th Birthday Lily

We'll be celebrating in Disney so I'll leave this up for the week. My life would be so insignificant without you Bug!

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Our life is like a hot fudge sundae

When Lily was born we thought she was the most amazing human being we had ever laid eyes on. We thought we were the luckiest parents on earth to be her parents. She is like the best home made ice cream we have ever taken a taste of. She is sweet. She is cool. She is refreshing on a hot day and makes even the worst day much better. There is nothing like loving her and having her in our life. From her cute gap tooth smile, to her belly laughs, and her ability to let you cuddle her as long as you want and of course her sweet spirit. She’s our sweet bowl of ice cream.
When I got pregnant with Andi Jane we feared, she can’t be like Lily. How can we love her like Lily? She could never replace the cool, sweet flavor that Lily brings to our life. Will we love her fairly? What if she is more like a stale cookie compared to Lily’s ice cream? But she wasn’t. Andi Jane is sweet and sticky. She is more hot than cold. She naturally has an abundance of energy just like most people get after a surge of sugar. Her big brown eyes, her perfect teeth smile, her ability to tell jokes, to make up songs, to dance. Is she like Lily? No. She’s different, of course! But she’s a perfect fit in our family. She is the hot fudge that makes the ice cream even better.
Adding Oliver to the family I feared again, not so much my inability to love him, but understanding and relating to him. He is a boy. What do I know about boys? Will he love me back? Will I treat him differently? But of course when he came those worries flew out the window. I loved him with this amazing intense love that overwhelmed me at his arrival. These past 6 months watching him grow; finding out his personality makes me fall deeper in love. His happy demeanor, his sweet smile, the way we can stop him in his tracks by rubbing his ears. The way direct sunlight will make him sneeze without fail every time. Oliver is indeed the whip cream and cherry on top of our hot fudge sundae.
I feel like I ordered my family according to my sweet tooth. How lucky can I be?
I thank God every day for my sweet life!

Sunday, August 16, 2009


So we have our consult with the neuro surgeon Wed afternoon to discuss the VNS replacement. Pretty much just a necessary unnecessary appointment. I figure we will schedule the surgery then and I will update when I get that date.
Andi and I loved the pre school and I am so glad we decided to check it out. I still was going back and forth. This is my last year of having her at home, she will start Kindergarten next year and it will be all day. As much as she can drive me crazy, I know I will really miss not having her at home with me.
The school is great though, just 3 hours 4 days a week. They let her sit in on the class with them and she loved it! Then we got the grand tour and she wanted to stay. This will be so good for her! She loves socializing and I think we will get along a whole lot better when we get a little break from each other.
I'm totally convinced 6 months is way too young for a baby to be cruising furniture. Oliver has no idea what he is doing so when he tries to go from the couch to the music table he eats it every time and screams and gets crocodile tears. Every time with out fail. 9 month old kids who cruise kind of "get it" and try not to get hurt. This boy is hurt all the time.
Andrew and Andi just got back from Greer, they went for the weekend and I am glad to have them back. Lily and Oliver are a lot of work by myself!

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Best Intentions

I've been "staying home" for 6 months now. Previously Andi went to daycare 3 days a week from 8 mo old to almost 4 yrs old. So she was never in daycare full time, ever. Lily was with me until she started pre k half days at 3 yrs old. So I guess I've always been a half and half stay at home and work outside of home. Well for 6 months I've been "home", were never there so that is why we air quote the word home. But I mean by "home" I mean all mama all the time. Dr. Laura said to do it. She sure made a lot of sense when I was driving to and from work feeling guilty the whole time. Driving. Alone. In a quiet peaceful car. Going to work with adults.
I do still work. I just do it mostly from home and I go into the office once or twice a week. I am in charge of the most ridiculous 401k plan that I want to throw in the the way, why is there no 401k plan administrator day? We need one. We're going through some changes demanded by our current economy and let me say it is a a bad word Andrew always says....something about clusters and f bombs.
But when I go into the office I carry a entourage and there is no Jeremy Piven involved. It is an energetic 4 year old and a baby, who honestly is a piece of cake to care for....let me reiterate, energetic 4 year old.
I have been running in circles with this whole thought of pre k. I figure, she already knows all she needs to know to go to Kindergarten, so that isn't an issue. She gets socialized by gymnastics, church, play dates, etc. That is not a problem either. Pre k is expensive and our van just gave us a new payment to add to the list. But she is BORED at home. I cannot keep up with her constant, "Let's swim", Let's dance", "Let's craft" etc. She has more energy than any other human I know and she never naps. Therefore I have decided she is going to pre k. I don't care if I have to dance at night..... she is going to pre k. You all know no one wants to see me dance, but my point is, we will not eat groceries in order for her to get out, get some structure and make friends. We are going right now to tour the one I like most, from referrals and the website.
I'll keep you posted.
And Dr. Laura, eat it. She will enjoy it better than hanging out with me, all day, every day.
Besides maybe now I can only take one kid to the gyno.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Take a little help...

I'm sitting here while Lily is being double teamed by OT and Speech. Andi is playing with the therapists toys and Oliver is trying to do what ever Andi is doing. She doesn't want to share and I am already getting a glimpse into the world of sibling rivalry, something I have managed to avoid even after being a parent to two kids for over 4 years. Let the games begin.
Last night we had a family day at a local pool for our church. It was so much fun! I really love our church and all the awesome families I am getting to know! The kids had a blast! I am amazed at the local High School pools we have here. They include huge areas for kids with jungle gyms, water slides, lazy river and a large toilet bowl type thing that spins you around. It is amazing at how well Andi swims! She was even jumping off the diving board and swimming to the edge. It was incredibly impressive, especially since besides her the youngest kids to jump were well over 6 yrs old. Lily loved swimming around with dad and Oliver is a water baby! He LOVES the water!
Today we used our Hab hours for some good! We found someone we like and she is able and willing to take Lily to horse therapy at 6am for me. WOW! What a blessing that is! I still have to get Lily up, fed and dressed by 5:45am, but then she takes her for me and brings her back. So far so good. Last week I took her with us to train her and this week she did it alone. This really makes our mornings easier, Andrew can now go to work at 5:30am like he likes to and not have to wait around for me to get back with bug after 7am. So this is a good thing, let's pray it continues to work well. It is so hard to let someone else take your child in their car and be responsible for them. But I am doing my best to relax some. Just some. I can't totally and won't.
So we're doing well. Totally looking forward to our trip to Disney at the end of this month, Lily will be the luckiest birthday girl this year and who deserves it more than her????

Saturday, August 8, 2009


I decided to go ahead with the replacement of the VNS. I think it is one of those "don't know what you have until it's gone" knowing that it is off and has been for awhile now I think it helped her with some of the seizures, but also with alertness and hopefully a better "tude". Lately the little miss is just all over the place, happy then sad. It's hard to keep up with. And man she cries and loud. And all through the night.
Not sure what we are going to do on our family vacation to Disneyland. I don't want her waking everyone up all night long, but I also rather not give her the Valum. I swear if she gets it at night she has more cluster seizures the next day. Not sure if that is possible, but I swear it to be true.
I just think maybe it is this enormous growth spurt she is going through right now, it is making her off balance in every way. But seriously if she is this moody at almost 7, I cannot wait for 13.
She still has a LOT of myoclonic jerks and they really make her upset. I don't know what helps those. It's so annoying we stop the grand mals that ruined her day, but now she jerks and drops all day long which piss her off which in turn of course ruins her day.
Have I said it today? I HATE SEIZURES!
On to the others, Andi Jane had 3 fillings the other day and did really well. My wallet is empty but she did well and I don't think she will be afraid of the dentist the rest of her life, more like the opposite. I think they shouldn't make fillings, that fun. When I tell her she will get cavities if she doesn't brush she says that's ok that was fun. She was pretty goofy on the laughing gas. She told the dentist she had been waiting for that appointment all year long. They said she should get out more often. LOL.
Oliver is good. Not only speed crawling, but pulling up on things. AND babbling. Thank God! I wouldn't care if he didn't crawl until a year as long as his speech were on target. Speech is just so huge and it is the hardest part of dealing with Lily, the lack of communication, so to hear those so important first steps to language, sure takes a huge load off my shoulders. Thank God!

Saturday, August 1, 2009


Heard Oliver up after a nap and went into his room and saw this...

He's not even 6 months until Wednesday!

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