Sad Days

So it’s been a bit of a sad day. Oliver is sick. He spiked a fever Tuesday night and it has been going on ever since. He has a cough, runny nose and high fever. Last night was 103 and tonight it was the same. But when the Motrin kicks in he is a wild man. 2 hours ago he was hot, whiney and clingy. Now it is 8:30pm and he is crawling and climbing, playing peek-a-boo all the while his big sister is fast asleep in bed. Andi Jane went to stay at the rental Grandma and Grandpa Nothdurft are staying in. I thought I’d be in bed by now watching Grey’s Anatomy but little man has other plans. He sure is cute. Lucky!
What was really sad today was the discussion I had with Andi Jane. Andrew and I went to Old Navy last Saturday, just us two, since G & G N are in town we are taking full advantage! We see some boots that are UGG knock offs but bright pink with hearts and flowers. Totally adorable! Andrew sees them and says we have to get those for Andi. I agree and we get them. We bring them home and she is in love with them! She wears them with what she was wearing. The next day, Sunday, she wore a black sundress with hot pink winter boots to church. Monday to pre school she wore a pink dress, tights and the boots. Then she says she wants to wear tennis shoes on Tuesday and on Wednesday, then today I say “your boots would match, wear them!” she says “no” I ask “why” and she says “Mary (name has been changed) says my boots are not cute.” “What?” I ask and she says the same thing again. I say “who cares” but Andi Jane cares. Although I am upset I let it go for a bit and tell her to get ready. She starts playing with Oliver, not getting ready, and he squawks a bit, probably because he is not feeling well, but Andi overreacts and cries, “He doesn’t like me!” I go to her and say “what is going on?” and she just starts bawling “Mary doesn’t like me! She is always mean to me!” Well I immediately grab her and hold her and try to dry my eyes before talking more to her. I am livid that a 4 year old has upset my daughter this much. I realize she might not be totally innocent, but this all started from boots! Boots! I remember when I dropped her off that day a mom and her teacher both complimented the boots and I can only imagine Mary was jealous of the attention Andi was getting. I did chat some more with Andi, I should call it fishing and I guess there have been a couple incidents that have happened, but she has said that her teacher has stepped in and said we are all friends, so I know she is in a safe loving environment. I also know that not everyone will get along and Andi Jane is a bit much at times, I know not everyone will want to be her best friend, but I guess I wasn't ready for this to happen so early. I am even more aware that this is only the beginning. I know. Take it from the girl who had the school article that was written about her hung up in the courtyard with holes in the face and the word b*tch written all over. I know. I just wish she didn’t have to know.
This parenting thing never lessens up, does it?

Gait Trainer

So Andrew asked Lily's PT if she thought Lily was ready for a walker. I wasn't quite sure she was ready for that, but her PT brought over a loaner to see. It is way too small for her, but we were just seeing what she would do in one and to see if it is justifiable to try to order one. Well let me show you how she did!
**be patient she will get into the light after a few seconds, I'm gonna need to ask for a good digital video camera for my birthday**

Holy Spearmint

Last week started out poorly. I took all three kids on Tuesday to get Lily’s x-ray for her Shriners apt on Friday. Shriners runs a clinic one day every three months so as you can imagine there are a lot of patients, making it a long day. I was trying to be proactive by getting Lily’s x-rays done earlier. I was a dummy bringing all kids. I had Oliver eating fake plants, Andi chasing him being very loud. I had to have a guy help me get Lily out of her chair b/c there was no where for Oliver to go but in the Bjorn on my chest. Then on the x-ray table the tech said her diaper was dirty and can I take it off. Of course her diapers were in the van! Of all the times for her to poop! We had her lay on the table with a blanket over her then I had to put one of Oliver’s size 3 diaper on her to last her to the van. Lily is 55 lbs. Oliver is 18 lbs. Imagine it. After they do the pelvic x-ray they dismiss us. I say “what about her spine?” They said “there is no rx for spine”. “But that is why we have this appointment on Friday! I need her to get a second opinion on her scoliosis!” They said, “well we can do it on Friday”. Sigh….. this was exactly why I came on Tuesday so I didn’t have to spend my entire Friday there. Sigh, and double sigh. I was overwhelmed and frustrated. Tears came to my eyes. I push Lily out, Oliver in Bjorn and Andi Jane following behind. I have to put a regular diaper on Lily and then load her up into the van, banging my head in the process, saying a bad word after that. “What did you say?” asks Andi Jane, “nothing” I mumble feeling very upset with myself for handling myself so poorly and I realize that we’ll get this figured out. I always do. We’ve made it thru 7years of these frustrating situations; we’ll make it thru this one.
Dropped Lily off at school, Andi off at pre school and went home.
A couple hours later I cooled my head; I vented it out and had my brilliant idea. Lily just had a spine x-ray back in June, that was how she got the scoliosis dx in the first place and that is what I wanted the second opinion on. All I have to do is request a copy of that x-ray and bring it with us. I call and she says no problem, she will have it at the front desk so all I had to do was make that nice long drive out to downtown Phoenix and get it.
So Wed at the gym I tell bestie my plans and she says drop Andi off at school and bring Oliver to her place to nap so I can get it without the kids. 1 hour drive each way, by myself! Heaven! I could listen to what I want; quiet might be all I wanted. I didn’t have to worry about ruining nap time. I said sold and that was my plan.
I got to Phoenix and got the disk without a hitch. Feeling a little hungry I stop at Taco Bell. Right by the drive thru talkie thing is standing a homeless man on crutches. My initial reaction was to skip out on Taco Bell completely, but I decided to go on to the drive thru. I order and he quietly asks me for money. I look in my wallet and see a $5 and a $10. I selfishly refuse to give him that so I find a couple quarters and at that moment the drive thru talkie thing says “you have to leave our customers alone”, the homeless man looks a little scared and starts to walk away before I even hand him the change. I say “here, sorry it’s all I have” I lied. I drive up and apparently the employee heard me talk to the homeless man. “As long as he isn’t bugging you”, I say “I felt bad for him” the employee goes on about he has a broken leg and is harmless but so many effing old ladies say this homeless man is bothering them and he is cussing on and on about people being mean to this homeless man. If I didn’t think he had something nice to say amongst all his swear words I’d probably be offended. I get my two tacos and drive away. All of a sudden I have this huge guilty feeling, it overwhelms me and I realize that I have to give that guy my taco. This isn’t me, I know so many people feed homeless; I am not trying to say I am a saint, quite the opposite. I tend to be a bit selfish and stingy with my money. I am not proud, but I am telling you this because the feeling that overwhelmed me was foreign and relentless and even though I couldn’t find him at first, I knew I had to keep on looking for him. I slowly drive down a side road and finally see him hobbling down the road. I turn a street ahead of him, pass a park with another homeless person sleeping in and stop and wait for him to come by my car. When he does I ask if he is hungry. My heart was beating, my palms were sweating. I don’t do things like this. He looks me in the eye and with that same quiet voice says yes and I hand him my taco. A good one too, chicken fresco. He says thank you and God bless you and I drive away. I eat my other taco and began to worry if he wouldn’t like that taco; it wasn’t probably what he would order. I thought about how many times I have felt that feeling and I totally ignored it. And it dawned on me that was exactly what my pastor was talking about the pervious week. Listening to that urging voice, he said it was the Holy Spirit, you can call it what you want, but I know that wasn’t my voice. My voice says yeah that is sad, but not my problem. But at that moment, it was my problem. I look back and think I should have given both my tacos and some cash, I should have taken him to the hospital, I should have done more, but I do know I fed him. Maybe the first thing he has eaten that day, or in a couple days. This was something so simple. Cost me a dollar. And I am sure it made more of a difference in my life than his, but I like to think it is a beginning for me. I’m gonna be like George Castana and go with the opposite of what I would normally do.
Our apt on Friday with Shriners went smoothly; Andrew took time off to stay home with the other two so it was just Lil and I. The x-ray I gave them was sufficient enough, Dr said it was deceiving and while he can see why a Dr would rx a brace from the x-ray, if he just moved her around and checked her out physically he can see her scoliosis is flexible and not rigid and he would not at this present time recommend a brace. You could hear the cheering in my head after that. He said see us in 9 months and we’ll reevaluate it. So… yay! Thank God for second opinions. Thank God for the wherewithal to know to not just listen to one Dr’s opinion. And thanks to the awesome PT Lily has that fights every fight with us and knows Lily and knows what Lily is capable of and she encourages us to fight the right battles.
I know this post is long but it was a week of impact. It started feeling self pity and ended so wonderfully. If only every week could be filled with so many life lessons. Usually it is just filled with poop and boogers.

Wishes in the Dark - Author Unknown

Sometimes when she's sleeping I can see in my mind's eye the little girl I thought I had,

the one who said good-bye.
Sometimes when she's sleeping, hands folded by her cheek I close my eyes and see before me a child who can speak.
Sometimes when she's sleeping she seems so whole and well I can't believe she won't awaken with dreams of which to tell.
Sometimes when she's sleeping and the tears in my eyes overflow, I steal what kisses I can in the darkand wonder what joys she will know.
Sometimes when she's sleeping and my eyes ache with tears unshed, I pray she'll always be full of peace as she slumbers in her bed.
Sometimes when she's sleeping I can almost hear her say "I love you, Mom, with my heart and my soul, each and every day".
But always when she's sleeping I am full of pride at the miracle that is my daughter and the perfection that is inside.

Reason number 1280 why home schooling is not for us

Andi Jane: Mom, what makes orange?
Me: Nothing
AJ: No what colors do you mix to make orange
Me: Orange is a primary color, you start with it
AJ: No Mom, you mix it
Me: No you mix orange and yellow to make red
AJ: No mom! We made orange in school.
Me: What did you mix? Brown and yellow?
AJ: No! Oh I know! We mixed yellow and red!
Me: Oh that’s right, red is the primary color.

Apparently I am not smarted than a preschooler. (I am totally humbling myself just by sharing this story)

Garden Anyone?

I have been asking (read: begging) for a garden for some time now. Andrew's dad had a nice one so I know Andrew knows how to do it. Aunt Gloria and Bill have a nice one and when I went to my friend Julie's house and saw hers and we ate salad with tomato's from it, that was it! I WANT A GARDEN! So after much whining Andrew finally built me one. He brought someone to help him and they spend 8 hours building this:

He made planted all kinds of goodies and marked each spot so nicely, it was so cute!

Then he leaves for awhile, I wasn't home yet, when I get home I hear a whole lot of yelling and see a whole lot of muddy dogs. Uh oh. I did mention we really shouldn't do it without a fence, first, but it really wasn't a good time for I told you so. So what took Andrew 8 hours to build, it took the dogs about 30 minutes to dig up.

After much complaining and lots of words that would make a sailor blush, Andrew raked it back up and put in a fence, a fence that I'm sure that has shorten his life by several years, he was not loving that project.

So here is the final product:

We aren't sure if anything will grow and most likely if anything does grow it will be snap peas next to tomato's, zucchini intertwined with carrots. Maybe we will make the first "oniotte". But this is our first run, a trial round before spring. I will keep you posted with how this turns out.

For Grandma Nancy

My mom is so funny. This link is for her CLICK HERE

She calls me the other day and says "do you want to go to see Grease it is at the Dodge Theater, Taylor Swift is in it?", "Wow! Really? Isn't she on tour? How is she is a play as well? What does she play Sandy?", mom says she really doesn't know. Then boom it dawned on me...."Taylor HICKS, mom, Taylor HICKS and no thanks."
Not that I wasn't all for the "soul patrol", but I've seen the play before and it couldn't compare to the movie if it tried, and don't try to tell me they tried, they did not.
Anyway, my mom makes me laugh and this SNL skit came to my head the minute that conversation happened.